Thursday, March 08, 2007

What My Dog Watches on TV

This past Monday night I was busy around the house after work, doing dishes, some light housework that had not been done over my busy weekend of sitting around drinking coffee and shopping, and earlier that evening I had turned the TV on in the living room to keep my four-year-old Dachshund company. She was looking at me with those sad, lonely eyes, the same way my boyfriend looks at me when I have spent too much time working on the computer and not enough time sitting by him while he watches TV. Annie was begging for some company in there, and I was determined to finish what I had started, which is a very rare occurrence for me.

In the kitchen, I was washing dishes, carefully drying them all and putting them away, when I heard domestic violence in the living room. Rushing in there, I found Annie sitting in the recliner facing the television, her elbow resting on the arm of the chair, and one foot on the remote. She tried to regain her composure quickly enough to turn the channel back to the Animal Planet, but I caught her watching "Wife Swap."

Have you not always wondered what your dog watched while you were gone or otherwise occupied? Well, guess what? They apparently are watching "Wife Swap," an embarrassing, obviously sometimes violent and demeaning little reality show that no adult human should watch, much less the home's four-year-old! Okay, okay, she IS a dog, I know that. And when I wrenched the remote away from her, she actually, I swear, cried. I guess that might have been because I got her toenail caught in one of the buttons, but it had the proper effect on me.

What choice did I have then, but to sit down with her and watch the rest of the show, right? I made us a bowl of popcorn and never took my eyes off the TV screen. This was the conversation going on with myself, oh and with Annie:

"That's disgusting! That jerk! He doesn't DESERVE a wife! WALK OUT ON HIM, WALK OUT ON HIM!!"

Annie was very satisfied with herself. I think she knew all along what she was doing. If you cannot get the human's attention with the sad eyes, get her with "Wife Swap."

That crafty little dog! She even set the DVR to record the show! Dogs are definitely smarter than we give them credit for.

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